The Twelve Best Free Online Dates of Christmas Time

The Twelve Best Free Online Dates of Christmas Time

The Twelve Dates of Christmas Time

I have been publishing a few cryptic status updates on Facebook recently in regards to the many suitors within my crazy dating life. Since heading back online, i have had some super weird horror tales (that I’ll conserve for a subsequent entry) however for now, we thought you would enjoy a far more in depth description associated with guys i am speaking with.

The term is used by me»men» instead loosely!

Suitor number 1: Name: JJ Age: 39 Height: 6’3 Job: Engineer Lives: Long Island OkCupid Match: a disappointing 69% he shall be called by us JJ, mostly because that’s the nickname just their sibling is permitted to utilize. From someone else, he hates it. Kinda anything like me with Kimmy. You can easily phone me Kim, Kimberly, or Kimba, but also for the love of all things holy, PLEASE usually do not phone me personally Kimmy. (Unless you are my small cousin. I am called by him Timmy. Cutest thing ever! ) JJ and I also were dating for a number of months. We came across on the internet and their writing hooked me personally above whatever else. He is acutely smart, specialized in their work, well look over, super nerdy, and extremely tall. Our times have actually included pizza and guy of metal, on a daily basis at the coastline, and a dinner that is swanky their friends among countless others. Our company is therefore great together. We knew We enjoyed him fairly early, and would cheerfully surrender my solitary woman status for the relationship that is real JJ. Since he is not «ready» to be exclusive / invested in me personally, he stated he’s «completely okay» with me speaking with other dudes. We occur to understand that he’s NOT okay with this particular, however, if that is what he wishes me personally to do, than We’ll do so. Enter the rest of the Suitors. Reputation: UNKNOWN

Suitor #2: Name: My Colleague’s Father’s company Partner’s Son — you may have previously learn about him in the last web log entry, My husband to be. Age: 29 Height: 6’0 Job: Construction worker Lives: has their home on longer Island OkCupid match: No clue, although i’d want to learn! My teammate in the office desired to set me personally up with # 2 over an ago, and through a series of circumstances, we never met year. He finally got my quantity and now we’ve been texting for many months. We have had a couple of good telephone calls, nevertheless the many disappointing thing had been which he ended up being a cigarette smoker. Instant deal breaker for me personally.

Suitor # 3: title: Dan Age: 38 Height: 6’0 Job: IT for a appropriate company in NYC life: Astoria OkCupid Match: 82% Dan and I also were chatting early in the day come early july, before i obtained afraid of males (which actually means i simply did not need to get harmed once again! ) He delivered great messages, packed with witty remarks and humor that is insightful. He is easy and smart to speak with making me feel immediately comfortable. Before we took my profile straight down for many months, we delivered Dan this message: «Hey, I got some personal material happening right now, so am using my profile down for a time. If you should be nevertheless on here once I reactivate it (which for your benefit i really hope you are not), you’re going to be the person that is first message. » Would not you understand it, a months that are few I updated my profile and within twenty four hours of logging on, Dan penned in my opinion. He stated, «Hey, i am hoping that you took enough time you had a need to sort everything away. Every couple was checked by me of times to see if perhaps you were online once more. We missed conversing with you. Welcome back. » And just that way, Dan and I started interacting each and every day. He is also more straightforward to speak with now that i am aware him better. We share loves of bacon, jazz, Cards Against Humanity, nyc, farmer’s areas, and nation music. Dan and I also simply just just take photos of y our text and food them to one another on a regular basis. He calls me personally through the food store to say things such as » we have pasta and eggs in the home. So what can we make with that? » and I also talk him through the aisles to generate something delicious. Our very very first call ended up being it felt so normal while he was wandering the supermarket, and. It felt like us. Status: ACTIVE

Suitor # 4: title: Steve Age: 32 Height: 5’11 Job: petrol fireplace repairman everyday lives: Long Island (way to avoid it eastern) OkCupid Match: 89% Steve and I began speaking about our provided passion for tea. The time that is first texted me personally, we’d both just sat right down to a hot glass of Trader Joe’s Pomegranate White Tea! Of all teas on the planet to be consuming at that time, fate tossed us to the exact same cup that is steamy. We took this as being a good indication, therefore we had a number of hour-long telephone calls. Steve provided me with their final title so of course I facebook stalked him. (Sorry people but it is 2013 — knowledge is power! ) There have been a few pictures of him with a child that is small but he’d never talked about a young child prior to. Their twitter handle had been on the website, and so I seemed that up too. The absolute most present tweet had been «My crazy bitch of a ex spouse whom hates me personally with all the fire of a lot of suns is stalking my twitter feed. Get fucking figure! » There have been a couple of other explicit tweets about just getting 4 hours per week together with his son, her being psycho, the whole world ass that is generally sucking. We do not judge anybody predicated on their social networking, but that may seem like too much baggage for me personally to manage straight away. Sorry, Steve. Reputation: ELIMINATED ON THE BASIS OF ANGRY TWEETS

Suitor #12: Name: The Pianist Age: 31 Height: 6’0 Job: Concert Pianist and Piano Teacher Lives: brand New Jersey (ugh) OkCupid Match: 93% The Pianist is incredibly achieved, educated, cultured, well look over, and well traveled. He spends the majority of their amount of time in Manhattan and made a decision to reside in nj-new jersey for the scene of NYC. He could’ve resided in Brooklyn when it comes to views of our reasonable skyline, but he prefers the impression of suburbia amidst the big city. He’s additionally a fan of inexpensive gasoline, low fees, and a broad selection of malls. He plays piano at sets from business activities to parties that are private concert halls. He teaches pupils through the protege that is youngest to your collegiate elite. He’s kind and thoughtful and keeps in touch just enough therefore me, but not so much as to scare me away that I know he’s thinking of. He is Armenian, that we knew absolutely absolutely absolutely nothing about except that the Kardashians are Armenian. (excuse me ahead of time to your whole nation of Armenia that the Kardashian clan may be the only thing we realize about your nation! Really, i did not even understand that much. The Pianist explained! ) He is wonderful thus far and I am extremely excited to make the journey to understand him better. Reputation: ACTIVE

Suitor #13: Name: Nick the Dick Age: an overgrown adolescent Height: gutter Job: irritating individuals life: in a dark and dirty destination OkCupid Match: this might be simply absurd Alright, I’m sure I had to throw this one on for good measure that I said there were twelve dates of Christmas, but. Bad, unlucky thirteen. Nick had been charming sufficient online but whilst the saying goes, «Good in some recoverable format, shit in true to life. » Nick skipped throughout the texting area of the on the web progression that is dating called me the moment he got my quantity. He had been really talkative (way too much so! ) and I could not get a term in edgewise. He explained he does not rely on love being all «doves and butterflies and performing and shit. Love is not that way. It is crap usually. You have simply surely got to find some body it is possible to tolerate. » He additionally stated that after children that are raising «it’s best to simply place a sack over their heads often so that they shut up and listen. You know what they do say about physical physical violence: whether or maybe not it’s not working, you aren’t making use of enough of it! » And lastly, as he asked exactly what my weirdest online dating sites experience happens to be, we told him in regards to the man week that is last wished to pee on (with? ) me personally. Nick’s reaction had been «and so I guess permitting me just take a shit for you may be out of this relevant concern, cause you are a prude? » Status: ELIMINATED ON THE BASIS OF ARE YOU KIDDING that is FUCKING ME.